Tuesday, November 23, 2021

(1)

Dear Mommy, 


I finally gathered the courage and strength to make the blog and write down what I've been feeling for 23 years. 


I wish I knew the destinations of the letters. But alas, I don't. It's You whom I've missed the most throughout my childhood. On happy and difficult days. And it's not easy to put into words how the feeling has been. Because it is so intense. I believe it makes a huge part of me. 


Life hasn't been treating me very well recently. I'm having very frequent emotional breakdowns, crying out aloud and whatnot. Every day in life makes me miss you even more. And the intensity is unimaginable. 


My first letter to you shan't have so many sad things to read. So let's skip to the good part (it's a song from new insta reels, do you have Instagram there, oh you must have better things I'm sure haha) The good part is I'm well alive. Not choosing to give up even in the most difficult times. I have a few exceptionally amazing people in life. They help me go through everything. You are constantly in my mind in every good and bad choice of mine. I wish I could share my life with you. I have missed you the most growing up. And still do. But I don't wish you to miss me, because it's a terrible terrible thing to feel. 


I don't know what language you speak, so when we meet we might be quiet and awkward. Doesn't matter. I'd meet you at any cost and any part of the universe. I'm sure love reconciles. Despite all. Maybe someone like Doctor Strange will arrive and with all their power, they'll bring together all the dimensions and we'll meet.


Maybe for a second

And I'll make it a lifetime. 

I promise. 



Yours lovingly,

...  

(8)

 Dear mother,  I miss you amidst all the crowd, all the meaningful conversations, all the sorrows, panic, joys and happiness and you know it...